In 1954 James Bond ordered the first ‘ultra cool martini’ by uttering these words:

“A dry martini,” he said. “One. In a deep champagne goblet.”

“Oui, monsieur.”

“Just a moment. Three measure of Gordon’s, one of vodka, half a measure of Kina Lillet. Shake it very well until it’s ice-cold, then add a large, thin slice of lemon peel. Got it?”

“Certainly, monsieur.”

The barman seemed pleased with the idea.

Gosh, that’s certainly a drink,” said Leiter.

Bond laughed. “When I’m..er..concentrating,” he explained, “I never have more than one drink before dinner. But I do like that one to be large and very strong and very cold and very well-made. I hate small portions of anything, particularly when they taste bad. This drink’s my own invention. I’m going to patent it when I can think of a good name.”

Every one of us remembers Bond and his Martinis and almost all of us at one time or another wish we could have pulled off something that cool.

With whimsy, I suggest that if you have the nerve to walk into a fine establishment anywhere in the world and say to the waiter…

“I’ll have a Vidal Icewine, chilled, with two spicy Thai shrimp on the side…

“and my friend will have a Riesling Icewine, also chilled, with two Malpeque Oysters on the half shell and a thin twist of lemon zest.

“Serve it first, and then we’ll order.”

..no sommelier in the world will mess with you.

You will have just pulled off that thing James Bond did with the Martini in 1954.

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I was writing this passage in my Icewine book, (which you can download free at www.vinocanada.com) and was struggling to explain that after reading the book the reader would be one of the most knowledgeable people in the world about Icewine.

So I started doing some math.  6 billion people.  There are probably 6,000 people who know something about Icewine, including (and I love you all dearly) many sommeliers who would claim to know, but don’t quite.  So then I did some math and I had to use a calculator to make sure I got the decimal point in the right place.  6000 out of 6 billion is 0.000001.   If you read the Essential Icewine Companion, you’ll know more than 99.999999% of the people on this earth do.

Here’s a bonus: If you catch me making a mistake with the decimal place, you’ll prove you know more than me about statistics!

I wrote this for one of the chapters in my Icewine book.  The Essential Icewine Companion is guaranteed to give you the tools to be cooler than Bond!!

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